It got me thinking about the gifts that we receive from our parents, not at holidays, or graduations, but everyday over the long haul of our childhood until now. The gifts that affect who we ultimately become. The gifts that were given to us and how to intentionally craft those into the next generation.
My mum, always said.. “While I spend most of my waking hours reviewing reports, and dealing with people, I dearly want to ensure that my own children are equipped to deal with the world…” and this requires resilience.
She has been the force behind the family. As any other working women, she too was suppose, to balance her life at home as well as at work. Post marriage, I have been listening to that special piece of advice from her, a little more, a little lot. Deja Vu.. !!
I miss her and my family, a lot. I miss her presence and that special “us” time with each other. Together, we used to talk about everything, about our office even though it made no sense to each of us, the new shopping list, the new restaurant in town, the new dress and a little more pocket money from her… the list is endless. These conversations allowed both of us, to release what all we had. For not any of us was looking for a piece of advice or note of suggestion – but a listener.
A little hug before we left for work, a little wave of care, a sweet <wide> smile seeing each other at home, after work was enough for both of us to feel overwhelmed. The feeling of belongingness is beyond words. These small gestures not just gave each of us the confidence for every accomplishments we gained but also the courage to fail, if necessary in the effort of completing a task and yet stand up again and try another chance.
Lately, our phone conversation has been more of, how are we both doing? – She argues the fact that today’s lifestyle does not allow us to take care of ourselves and spend time family and I add on to let her know, that every desk at my office has a family photograph, which means that each one is still connected to the family and this is what you have taught me, like all the other lovely mum in the world have.
I agree to some extent, but then I have my reasons to let her know, I have all that she taught me. I may not be perfect, but she has made me one.
Mum, Let me tell you… I am your daughter (and now a daughter in law) and this is what you have taught me –
A 5 year old girl, who learn how to tie her own shoes lace and has never asked you again.
A 7 year old naughty girl who wanted to clean the bathroom after playing with Holi color, so that I did not add another task to your list of house hold chores.
A 10 year old confident girl, who would walk upto the market and buy groceries just the way you do. (Have I told you, I love imitating you)
An teen-girl who used to get up and get ready for her school on her own.
A 20 years old studying graduate student, working to earn her own pocket money and to give you that first 500 INR note as my first salary.
A daughter in law, who is now learning to make her home a place she has always been in. (I am learning patience and art of miss-you less)
I still remember, “There’s no other way to say it. If you’ve never struggled, it’s absolutely impossible for you to be self-sufficient in something.”
Thank you mum – for making me who I am today. That time spent together has been and will always be the source of energy that I would need any day to nudge me to get back on track. You have been the source of encouragement and I feel proud to be your daughter.
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